First Date Frenzies

First date frenzies… the craziness affects us all one way or another. Every relationship begins with a ‘first’ meeting or introduction of some type. Whether it’s a random ‘physical or virtual’ introduction—-leading into a planned physical connection, or actual ‘first date’—firsts are firsts and both male and female have thoughts—and panic attacks, cold and hot sweats… etc… (lol) along the same lines about ‘the first date’.

Will he or she like me? Will we have fun? Will I like him or her and will we have a second date? The next questions that follow are generally in this order: Will there be mutual Attraction? Sexual Chemistry? Emotional Connection? Will we have Sex?

With on line dating services, apps, etc. online meeting and greeting is quite the norm. For young adults, especially anyone born post cold war, (1990) are aware only of high tech communication in a fast paced world of ‘instant’ gratification.

That said, there are some things where the ‘process’ is vitally important—- and must ‘take time’. A healthy, happy, emotionally connected intimate relationship—is one of those things. An authentically ‘healthy and happy’ romantic relationship indeed takes time—–and has little to do, if anything… with ‘sex’ on the first date or not. Sex on the first date has to do with individual comfort zone and each individual moral compass, mutual attraction and shared comfort and safety level.

Love has nothing to do with sex.

Sex has nothing to do with love.

Mutual attraction has everything to do with a budding romance and is ‘the conduit’ to developing a mutually enjoyed romantic relationship with the man or woman with whom you fall in love.Give yourselves time to explore ‘whom you both are’, each to the other without feeling pressured or pressuring the other for immediate sexual gratification. If there is mutual attraction, then eventually there will be sexual gratification. That’s a given, I promise you!